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If You are Fem, How Do You Navigate Toxicity in Games?

Posted by Tsio Crev

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Forum: Games

If you identify as a female, how do you navigate around the toxicity in multiplayer shooter games?


Here's some context of my experience:

I have been playing Team Fortress 2 consistently since 2019, clocking in 2100+ hours. I am, I'd say, a decent player that can top frag every other game or round; however, even with that fact, I have turned off my voice chat for the most part. Commonly, I'd be called a kid or be vote kicked simply for being a girl even when I do the most for the team and am top fragging. 

Now, you can blame me for this one. By far, the worst experience I've had is when Face It began to support TF2 and I tried it out. Instantly, sweaty gamers degraded me for my gender even though I was contributing the most. It doesn't bother me as much, since it's Face It. Pretty sweaty. 

I have a few reddit links of women in TF2 going as far as to use a voice mod just to be able to play comfortably. If TF2 is bad, I'd hate to see how bad it'd be for me to play COD and other games. Over the past years, just playing one multiplayer FPS game hardened me and taught me how to shit-talk from scratch and also take some blows. 

I think a lot of fan artists in game communities are female and nonbinary, yet they would be pushed out just because of their identity. 

Not to mention how it is being trans ( I am not, but I know players who are), that one is just an all around shit fest if bigots in the server find out. 



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I would say just keep doing what you're doing and ignore it. Playing with people you already know might just help.  That's all you really can do, unless you know their address. :/ 

Hopefully you have a good support system if that starts to affect you too much. Ya know?

I personally never had a problem, but I've only played COD, Warface or something like modern warfare.  Sorry you have to experience that :(( 

Much love :)


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Reply by KiethBlackLion

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As a long time gamer (I'm 41 and have been playing games since 1988), I've never understood why some idiots treat non-male gamers the way they do (but then again, those types of people will target someone over any stupid thing). Growing up, if I met a girl who said she was into video games, that was the best thing ever. Some people are just insecure and frankly, just assholes.


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Reply by Lilli <3

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I'm sort of the opposite tbh! I wouldn't call myself good, but I play average. I mainly play overwatch, which is my bad, but I tend to avoid voice chat. I have a deeper voice for a girl and like you said, I either get ridiculed for being a girl or called a child. When voice chat is necessary, and they're losers, I just don't let it bug me. Their largest criticism is something they don't even get. It all stems from a place of bitterness and resentment bc they have no game. Just let it flow over you, you know you're good. Keep that energy.


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