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Hello! I don't really know how else to preface this without venting, so here's a heads-up on that one. I feel like the solutions to my particular feelings of loneliness are very very specific to my situation.
Lately, I've been so busy with my school organization and my endless college backlogs, and it's kind of turned into a domino effect of pain I'm currently experiencing. Firstly, for context, I'm currently taking up animation and I genuinely feel that is where I am at my strongest and most comfortable at. I love being able to problem solve with the way I do art. But this semester in particular, I have barely drawn. I've been busy doing my research for my animated thesis. And I do like research, but this is a solo project and I would be lying if I said it wasn't very, very tedious, especially for a perfectionist like me, who is really, really into the topic they are discussing.
As I previously mentioned, I've also been busy being the Logistics Head of our organization, one that I joined for being a creative. And there is a LOT that I am learning and doing and this momentum of bringing myself to learn and do new things to improve is great. But I've been at it for way too long and I'm just so tired. I have not been in my element, and it makes me feel worthless and tired. I also recently had an altercation with a friend of mine who had also ended up making me feel very worthless and incompetent. That issue is solved, but I think it still somewhat affects me to this day.
Now, I don't really have the time to do things on my own or to go out to maintain the relationships I have. I also had recently taken a break with my partner because they had yet to change a huge problem I had with them that hurt me deeply. And I know the rest of my closer friends are going through it too. Even if I could reach out, again, I'm just too busy and tired.
Now that I'm typing all of this out, I really am Going Through It and it's a little embarrassing eheh
But regardless, I'd just really like to know anyone's thoughts on being able to deal with loneliness, or at least mediate it, by ourselves! I've recently been straying away from social media where I see IRL people, since seeing everyone go out and have fun just hasn't been the best for my brain. Comparing myself sucks!!! I've also tried squeezing in a few doodles and it does help for a short period of time. It sucks that I currently can't take the big steps to actually solve loneliness (aka actually involving other people), but the least I can control right now is myself!
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No matter how much, or how often people hurt each other, loving someone is never a waste ╰(*´︶`*)╯♡
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