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Heyy!! I struggle with "high functioning" bpd. I hate using the words "high functioning" because FUCK this isn't very high functioning, It's all just directed inwards. I have trouble keeping a job due to my impulses, moods, and inability to even get out of bed a lot of the time. I haven't been able to manage a friendship because of my splitting, I've only had one person stay with me despite my bpd. They are my best friend, I know that I can get overwhelming so I feel bad for putting them through this. they are the most patient person I've been with. I've become extremely distant from my family, I love them so much but it's like everytime I visit I just feel so misplaced. It destroys me in the moment because they constantly give hugs, kisses, love; so where am I? Ya know? :[
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Quiet BPD
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Reply by ⛧abilify⛧
posted
didn't know abuot quiet bpd, thanks for sharing!
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Reply by Jacqs<3
posted
I'm so sorry. I have bpd as well but I think I have quiet bpd so I tend to hide my symptoms more, which made the psychiatrist that assessed me think that I don't suffer enough for it to be on my medical record. It's damaging and it's definitely not high-functioning. I feel lonely and empty and it's like I'm longing for something I don't know to complete me. It's hard not to feel like you're being dramatic though, and I always wonder if I'm allowed to feel upset about stuff. I feel trapped in my mind and like I can't explain my sadness, and it just creeps up on me out of nowhere. I've never had a job because I also have social anxiety so I'm afraid of talking to new people and embarrassing myself, and I struggle with getting out of bed sometimes too. Life feels so hopeless but I hope this group can be helpful for us though because you're not alone!!