Hi... I'll start

I suffer from BPD and it's ruined every single one of my serious relationships. Now it's hard to feel hope of ever having a happy, healthy romantic relationship. I always have problems trusting when it comes to platonic relationships as well. I'm overly jealous, I often feel excluded or like everyone hates me/no one loves me, and I have huge trust issues, so I always think my partner/friend is hiding something from me/going behind my back with something. Besides the relationship issues, every. single. emotion I feel is extremely elevated. Happiness is elating, and sadness is utter depression; it often escalates and I turn incredibly suicidal/sometimes homicidal. It is very easy to completely dissociate when you're in a social setting. Sometimes those intrusive thoughts in your head sound like they're talking right in your ear. A lot of people will accuse you of being insane/crazy (don't listen to them - they don't understand). I think most importantly, you're never in reality. With BPD, most of the time you are hypnotized by your fantasies and they become your reality. The real world is timed out while you're in tunnel vision. Your reality is distorted.