Good to hear how you are being more accepting of your own needs.
When it comes to communities and subcultures, the value is limited to the locals who comprise such collectives.
And with most social trends, the age factor remains a strong predictor for integration success. The distribution of ages usually always follows a long tail shaped distribution with a strong uptake in highschool with those in their 20's being the bulk of the active crowd of any group. Activity tends to drop off as people age even though they are still part of the subculture.
There is nothing more frustrating than putting yourself out there, going into spaces and finding your company is with boorish young people.
The best advice is to have someone close to you whom you can trust to go along with you to gatherings in meatspace (once pandemic has been dealt with).