i miss my ex bff :(

So i have this friend that used to be my bff, we used to have a lot of calls and messages almost all the time, we liked us on instagram and all of that. But one time he exluded me on a school trip to six flags and he went with his other friends that he just met like a week before this. That time i really felt bad. The first school day after the trip he tried to talk to me about some thing about his ex situationship (that i hate but thats another thing) and i was really annoyed so i was really frank about it, i wasnt careful about it like i used to. 5 days after i wanted to talk with him about the six flags incident, but i kept it almost one weekend and i couldnt resist and i exploted and yelled at him in front everybody, it was actually humiliating for me, but overall for him bc he really cares about his reputation. At the end of the school day i wanted to talk and we did, we clarifyied everything and we ended in good terms. BUT its been 6 months since then and i cant with the guilt, bc we almost never message each other, we never do calls, we dont hangout anymore and basically we are not bffs anymore. I feel so sad bc he was like the only male friend ive ever had and i really miss him, what should i do? he should have guilt too? am i wrong? the university is in 2 months and im kinda desperate to finally close this cycle. PLS somebody help me :(

PD: He almost never interact with those friends so i really dont know what to think