I Over Eat and I hate it so much :(

TW: Eating Disorder.

I hate how I’m 245Ibs at 13 years old, and on top of that I have PCOS. Which makes weight gain worse. It’s like anytime I see food, I eat it all. And I feel nothing but guilt after. I feel awful. I feel Fat (which I am).

 There will be some days where I try to lose the weight, but I end up just gaining it back in the end. So I feel theres no point. 

When I was younger was no different either. I was constantly bullied and shamed for my weight. To the point where now I cry whenever I see my weight or someone tells me to step on a scale. I feel horrible. And I Feel helpless. It hurts me. And since I’m a child, I’m limited to weight loss options. 

Does anyone have any advice for me at all to loose weight or help me stop eating?