T I R E D H O P E L E S S

I live in one of the worst countries known to humanity and everyday my rights or someone else's rights are stripped from us, the fascists are leaving the country while me, my family and friends are trapped here. millions of others trapped and unable to leave; forced and bound to a chair to witness horrific events before our eye unfold in full effect. 'history has a strange way of repeating its self' they say. I DESPERATLEY and hopelessly daydream of a better life for me and my family but coming from someone whose 19 and has no job I always have to feel guilty about being unable to provide despite my dad saying I shouldn't rush too much and that I should peruse what I enjoy, which I appreciate those comforting words but I still feel like im slacking behind. it doesn't help that I'm about to graduate in two months either and I feel personally more rushed than I should be.

   I want to move out the country so so badly but with no money, no luck and nowhere to really go nor give me a sense of direction I feel like i'm just daydreaming of a life that doesn't exist. I want to be able to at least contribute to something within my family; something that'll impact them the most in the good long run. if anyone has any rescources to help move from one country to europe please do leave a link in the replies. it could be anything ranging from medical document transitions to even housing agencies over there and the basic prices of certain necessities and or appliances.