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so i've been friends with my best friend since we were 5yo, that was more than 25 years ago. but for the past years the relationship was very messy, i feel like she wasnt able to like me cause we've grown up to be so different. we were always complete oposites but that never affected our friendship. its only now that im not adapting to them that much and i was showing myself as what i really am (i mean ive always done but i started doing stuff w other people, stuff that i always wanted to do and i had no one to share those experiences with) she started getting like a wary attitude towards me.
i simply couldnt take anymore that she demanded from me i keep being a version of myself she could recognize, she said i was acting childish and i wasnt being mature. also just the way i talked got on her nerves.
i snapped and i said we should then stop being friends cause i didnt see that going anywhere. i felt super frustrated. i said some cruel stuff.
its been months since then, obviously my head's cooled down but i still dont know if its worth it messaging her and saying im sorry for those words?? i think i put up with a lot until i got to that point. but i dunno, i kinda miss her, but im afraid i wont ever find the version of her im looking for either.
what would yall do? message her or let it be?
shes getting married this year btw, and i was supposed to be maid of honor. i dunno whats up with that anymore. i dont think im going to the wedding anymore ??? friends we have in common have told me it still feels like an elephant in the room so???
tbh im so confused
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